Friday Filosophy v.11.19.2021
Steven Alexander Wright (born December 6, 1955) is an American stand-up comedian, actor, writer, and film producer. He is known for his distinctly lethargic voice and slow, deadpan delivery of ironic, philosophical and sometimes nonsensical jokes, paraprosdokians, non sequiturs, anti-humor, and one-liners with contrived situations. Wright was ranked as the 15th Greatest Comedian by Rolling Stone in its 2017 list of the 50 Greatest Stand-up Comics. His accolades include the Academy Award for Best Live Action Short Film and two Primetime Emmy Awards nominations as a producer. In this, our Friday Filosophy v.11.19.2021, we share some thoughts from Steven Wright.
- Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.
- What’s another word for Thesaurus?
- I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
- I went to a restaurant that serves ‘breakfast at any time’. So, I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
- Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
- A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
- You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?
- I have the world’s largest collection of seashells. I keep it on all the beaches of the world… perhaps you’ve seen it.
- Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring… ‘How to Build a Boat.’
- Right now, I’m having amnesia and deja vu at the same time… I think I’ve forgotten this before.
- I went down the street to the 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, ‘Hey, the sign says you’re open 24 hours.’ He said, ‘Yes, but not in a row.’
- I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn’t park anywhere near the place.
- For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier… I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.
- My doctor told me I shouldn’t work out until I’m in better shape. I told him, ‘All right; don’t send me a bill until I pay you.’
- I’m going to get an MRI to find out whether I have claustrophobia.
The Time is Now