Learning Without Scars’ founder, Ron Slee, is back today with a blog post on Ho’oponopono, the Hawaiian Principle of 100% Responsibility.

Seneca, one of the most important Roman Stoic philosophers, said “Luck is what happens when preparation comes across opportunity. Thomas Edison said his work was 90% perspiration and 10% inspiration. Louis Pasteur among many others felt the same way.

In every case I suggest it is much more important to be ready when opportunity comes to you more than anything else. That leads me to thinking about our lives and our work. How much of our lives is under our control? As someone who is known to be a control freak this is a nasty question. 

In Hawaii we are a society that is further away from any other on the planet. It is 2500 miles to the nearest population center of any kind. Our culture has a lot of different influences. From Asia, the Americas, Oceania obviously. But there are others that cause us to wonder. It seems that using language as our tool on determining origins the Hawaiian people originally came from the middle east. That too follows ancient historical thinking.

But let us go back to Ho’opononpono and one of its foundations which is the principle of 100% responsibility. The kahunas, the priests of our culture, state that each human being is 100% responsible for their own reality. That it is useless to blame other people. We are not victims unless we choose to be victims.

Ho’opononpono says that if you don’t like your reality then you must change it. Desmond Tutu, the archbishop for South Africa had a saying that I go back to often. “If it is to be it is up to me.” In other words, we control our own destiny.

That brings me to Learning Without Scars and our purpose for being. We are here to help people identify their individual potential both personally and professionally. We are here to open your Ho’oponopono and let you take control of your destiny, of your future. 

There is a problem with this line of thinking though, isn’t there?

This is a challenging work. Learning and developing and growing as a person are demanding work. For most of us it is too much work.

Let me digress for a moment. Dr Gail Matthews, of the Dominican University of California conducted a major study of “The Impact of Commitment, Accountability and Written Goals on Goal Achievement.” She found that writing down our goals increases the percentage of achieving those goals in a major way. It seems that psychologically when we write down our goals it is as though we are signing a contract with ourselves. So, let’s provide you with a simple little exercise now. Choose an area of your life in which you would like to correct something. Select from this list: 

  1. Love and Relations
  2. Money and Finance
  3. Goals and Work
  4. Health
  5. Learning and Personal Growth.

Now write down several phrases with the first thing that comes to your mind about one of the above list. 

I would like you to select Learning and Personal Growth.

Don’t worry about the order. Next look at what you have written and create at most three specific goals or actions. They must be positive. Put that piece of paper on your refrigerator. 

The Ho’oponopono means to correct an error. That makes sense, doesn’t it? Given that we are 100% responsible for our life if there is something we are unhappy with we must correct the mistake that got us to where we are now. However, that means that we must accept the reality that WE are 100% responsible for it.

This is one of the most critical elements of this process. Until you accept, you’re responsible, it will be difficult for you to change. Deep down everything depends on us and we must stop making excuses or blaming circumstances and get to change our lives. Here comes something that I understand and believe in. From this point on it has nothing to do with being lucky. It becomes a personal choice.

One other observation please. 

The easiest person in the world to lie to is your reflection in the mirror – AND – that is the last person in the world you should ever lie to.

We are never victims unless we allow ourselves to be victims. When I say this, I am speaking of our choices – not situations involving crime. Whatever your job is, your career, you can control your outcome. You can be open to learning. You can go back to school. You can ask for help. You can go to counselling. You have many opportunities. It is a matter of making a choice.

You can apply this principle of one hundred percent responsibility to all aspects of your life. Start with the premise that everything is created in your mind before it becomes reality. SO. Change the way you think and act. It will change your reality.

In Hawaii this is called “cleaning.” We will continue to repeat the same painful episodes and circumstances because they are all coming from our subconscious.

To overcome the subconscious, Hawaiian’s, use a string of four expressions: Forgive me, I’m sorry, I love you, Thank you. You must accept it is your responsibility and when you do you have to forgive yourself deep in your subconscious for the choices you have made that got you to where you are today.

Try it. You will be surprised. It works.

The Time is Now. 

This blog was provoked by a book with the title “Maneki Neko” by Nobuo Suzuki. For me it is a follow up to the book Ikigai. This book covers the Japanese Secret of Good Luck and Happiness, it is a terrific read.

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